“You must sleep with me tonight. I have paid for you with some mandrakes.”
“Why are you here?” Isaac asked. “You obviously hate me.”
She was beautiful, old enough to be married, and still a virgin. Check, check, check.
Sarah died when she was 127, in Hebron. Abraham said to the Hittite elders, “I am a stranger among you. Please sell me a piece of land so I can give my wife/sister a proper burial.”
Then God said to Abraham, “Why did Sarah laugh? Is anything too hard for the Lord? I will return and she will have a son.” (God didn’t get bent out of shape when Abraham laughed at the same idea.)
Abram replied, “I swear to God I will not take a single thread from you.
And God said, “I will destroy all humans. In fact, screw it all. I’ll destroy all living things. I’m sorry I ever made them." But Noah was the teacher’s pet.